As a longtimer, all I can say is “you’ve got this.” Seriously. If I could go back and do it all over, I’d hang out with more zine creators asking “Why the hell am I doing this?” over the people with supreme confidence of their skills and their products. Folks like you produce art we WANT and NEED, long before we know we need it, and we keep coming back because we know you’re doing it for the right reasons. From long experience, I know the supremely confident are, without fail, screaming narcissists who dump on contributors and readers the moment they’re not getting their expected levels of adoration, and for all of the noise they make early on, nobody remembers or cares even five years later, much less 30 or 40. Just keep doing what you’re doing: you’re doing great.
Sister in perfectionism recovery here. One thing helps me when I spiral out. When the monkey brain kicks in with its depreciating commentary I say "oh, I am thinking these thoughts again." It sounds like a clumsy hack and a cheap trick, but it works for me. It makes me remember I think thoughts; I am not thoughts.
....and I, too, am off all social media except Substack. 🤣🤣🤣
The ones who get it, get it! You're right. Identifying them outright is a good practice and one I'm working on continually in the aftershocks of an OCD diagnosis. Thanks!
I seriously hurt for my teenage self with undiagnosed OCD. She really couldn't handle virality then, and it cost her mind dearly. The older I get, the more estranged I feel from all the socials.
I'll just say, re: a virality that seems like it must be 'good' and 'wow how lucky' and the qualia from the inside is uhh not quite that—I'm a person on the Internet who is pretending to be another person on the Internet for REASONS and your post is very very very very very very very very very very relatable to me
Glad to hear it resonated! Yes. Internet virality is an unwieldy beast. I am honestly not so great at keeping my personal life and public persona separate, probably a result of being thrust into this world at such a tender age. I'm still learning how to do it. I much prefer the times when a few thoughtful comments come my way. Those make it all worth it for me :)
As a longtimer, all I can say is “you’ve got this.” Seriously. If I could go back and do it all over, I’d hang out with more zine creators asking “Why the hell am I doing this?” over the people with supreme confidence of their skills and their products. Folks like you produce art we WANT and NEED, long before we know we need it, and we keep coming back because we know you’re doing it for the right reasons. From long experience, I know the supremely confident are, without fail, screaming narcissists who dump on contributors and readers the moment they’re not getting their expected levels of adoration, and for all of the noise they make early on, nobody remembers or cares even five years later, much less 30 or 40. Just keep doing what you’re doing: you’re doing great.
Thank you for your kind words and continued, Paul! I always appreciate your longtimer zinester perspective :)
Glad to be of assistance. If there’s one thing I’ve learned from nearly 40 years of zine life, it’s that “time wounds all heels.”
Sister in perfectionism recovery here. One thing helps me when I spiral out. When the monkey brain kicks in with its depreciating commentary I say "oh, I am thinking these thoughts again." It sounds like a clumsy hack and a cheap trick, but it works for me. It makes me remember I think thoughts; I am not thoughts.
....and I, too, am off all social media except Substack. 🤣🤣🤣
The ones who get it, get it! You're right. Identifying them outright is a good practice and one I'm working on continually in the aftershocks of an OCD diagnosis. Thanks!
I seriously hurt for my teenage self with undiagnosed OCD. She really couldn't handle virality then, and it cost her mind dearly. The older I get, the more estranged I feel from all the socials.
I'll just say, re: a virality that seems like it must be 'good' and 'wow how lucky' and the qualia from the inside is uhh not quite that—I'm a person on the Internet who is pretending to be another person on the Internet for REASONS and your post is very very very very very very very very very very relatable to me
Glad to hear it resonated! Yes. Internet virality is an unwieldy beast. I am honestly not so great at keeping my personal life and public persona separate, probably a result of being thrust into this world at such a tender age. I'm still learning how to do it. I much prefer the times when a few thoughtful comments come my way. Those make it all worth it for me :)